Do you live a sad, beige life? Is your environment stylish, modern, and expensive, devoid of brightness and narrated by Werner Herzog? Then you'll fit right in with the latest aesthetic!
See, it's fashionable to flaunt the neutrality of natural, dye-free, minimalist clothing. After all, bright colors look so gauche, as if they were bought off the rack by smiling people. You wouldn't want your attire to conflict with your inner sadness. Such elite styles are available for sad beige children, too!
@sadbeige Honey wake up new säd beige just dropped #sadbeigechildren #bananarepublic #wealth #fy #satirecomedy #momtok #parentinghumor #DoritosTriangleTryout #richpeople #richpeoplebelike #comedytok
♬ October - Adrian Berenguer
These clothes, as well as home decor, actually come in many colors, so you can express every aspect of your sad beige life.
Hayley DeRoche is a novelist and comedian; you may have seen her work at McSweeney's. In her spare time, she's That Sad Beige Lady on TikTok. DeRoche took note of the minimalist aesthetic that eschews bright or unnatural colors being marketed to upscale mothers, and termed it Sad Beige. You'll want to check out more of her sad beige videos. Heaven forbid, they may even put a smile on your sad beige face. -via Everlasting Blort